A Southern Parenting Tale: Keep Your Pants On!

I didn’t think I would have to add “Keep your pants on” when I addressed my daughter before she left my sight, but that was before last month.

My 3-year-old managed to pull her pants down in my son’s post-basketball practice team huddle.

Oh, yes!  And might I add underwear and all.

It’s our fault. We should not have allowed her to be part of the huddle, but it was just one of those times when it was easier to let her go be part of the huddle then watch her climb all over the chairs and try to inch herself in the huddle on her  own.

Last time she was allowed in the huddle, she behaved. 

This time, she apparently had an itch on her bottom. 

Blame it on dry skin season.  Who knows why, but to make matters worse, we were oblivious. 

Here she is at the Biltmore winery channeling her inner Marilyn Monroe.  She discovered
the air vent. 

We didn’t know she decided to expose her bottom.   We were talking, and even though she was less than 10 feet in front of us, she was not in our view.  They were all in a huddle on the floor.  We were in chairs, and someone was sitting in front of us.

All of a sudden, the assistant coach came over and whispered something in my husband’s ear. 

I heard a gasp, “Oh, no!” and he got up.

I thought perhaps she peed in her pants.  She’s newly potty-trained. That would have been bad, and, truthfully, I dreaded the mess that he was about to bring back to me.

He came back all red-faced and said, “She pulled down her pants in the huddle.”

She what?

You mean she just exposed herself in front of nine first- and second-grade boys?

Yep. Pretty much.

I was mortified.  Strangely, I put my hands over my face and laughed silently into them.

I mean, really.  She’s 3.

We need to teach her to keep her pants on, especially in church and in the company of boys.

From this point, I’ll be more cautious and on the lookout for flying underwear.

 *This post was originally written for my TriangleMom2Mom column with the News and Observer, but I thought it was humorous so I'm sharing it here, too since my parenting tales are my way of recording funny moments in our lives. 

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